on conquering fears & growing courage

We’re writing a new chapter in life. We moved to Colorado over a year ago. While we were in St. Louis, we homeschooled until our oldest went off to sixth grade at a small, sweet Christian school. When we arrived to Colorado, I was needing a break. It was my year of jubilee. I needed rest and refreshment, and my boys, especially, needed a change, too. So the school plan for the year was to enroll in neighborhood schools. It was free and freeing, but more than a difficult choice.

So we loaded buses and packed lunches and cautiously entered the world of public education. At the end of the year, as we reflected on the pros and cons and the ups and the downs, we decided to bring our youngest home and continue on this wild and crazy homeschool journey. But it was not without a lot of prayers and a bit of fear and a whole lot of faith. Not to mention a few tears. Public school was fun, but we were being called back to homeschool.

My sweet girl is embracing change like a hero. She’s battled fears and conquered the giants in her mind. Will she find new friends? Will she keep her old friends? Can she trust God to take care of her little world? Our latest battleground has been enrolling in a weekly enrichment program with other homeschoolers. I did all but beg and plead her little heart to be open to what God had for her if she would just give it a try. {Okay, I may have bribed her just a bit.} For weeks, her heart was frozen with fear. Finally, after begging and pleading with God to change her heart and help her grow courage, we enrolled, and she gave it a shot. The first week was frightening. The second week was a little scary too. But this week, the third week, is getting a little easier.

This morning on the way to “school,” she shared. “Mommy, remember when you said that when we start this new school, God may be wanting to give me a gift of new friends? Now I just picture a Christmas tree with little presents underneath, and inside each is a little person waving up at me!” We laughed and laughed.

I reminded her that God may want to give her the gift of a new friend this year, or better yet, she may be the gift to someone else. The thought of her little body in a little box all neatly tied up with a bow made us giggle all over again.

She’s learning a lot this year. She’s learning how to divide three-digit numbers, how to identify possessive pronoun adjectives, and how to think like a scientist. But more importantly, she’s learning that whatever God has for her, that He is good, He is love, and He is with her. All. The. Time.

3/31

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I’m writing for 31 Days! Learn more about it here.

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